SUDDENLY, THERE IS AN INFLUX OF AWESOME ON THE TURTLE PARADISE WEBSITE.

Yup, we’re now part of the J-list affiliate program, so banners have, like, taken over the website or something. These guys stock some pretty hilarious stuff, so you guys should get a kick out of it, too! (right?) And if you click on one of those banners and end up making a purchase, a percentage will go back to Turtle Paradise and fund future scanlations and server maintenance, which means it’s great for everyone involved.

(PS: check out their snacks category.. IT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND.)

Also, Reb just started yelling at me about not doing a status update (BAAAAAW), so here it is. We’re gonna have a ton of stuff ready, and it’s gonna be ready fast. We got a ton of new, awesome staffers from that last post, and everyone’s finishing their projects all at once, lawl.

Oh, we’re plotting alright.

There are a million billion people out there in the world right now and I’m willing to bet that today is one of their birthdays. So here’s to you, Mister one in a million billion people out there in the world right now; be glad that on this day XXX years ago your mother catapulted you out of her gaping maw and into this world. Here, have this present of not one, but two chapters of Barajou… and thank YOU for being born.

Okay, so all Evangelion-based lampooning aside, I’ll bet you’re all wondering WHY this chapter took so goddamn long to get out. It’s because we no longer have any editors. Nope, not a goddamn one. Our last dependable staffer has disappeared off the face of the planet (like so many before her) and we don’t have anyone to step up to the plate in her place. And hopefully, that’s where one of you will come in. (By which I mean plz plz plz take the editor test oh my GOD we need help.)

ANYWAY! As of this chapter we’ve changed “Anise’s” name to the official romanization of “Anis”. PROTIP: It’s pronounced Ah-nis, with a soft “A,” not a hard “A” like in “Anus,” which is pretty much the reason we changed it to begin with. But worry not, we’re gonna go and re-do the earlier chapters to reflect that change later this month to make up for not releasing anything on the 21st. (Durp durr)

Anywho, thanks for being patient (Oh god I can’t say that with a straight face…), and enjoy the new chapters. Yeah. They’re plotty… Or at least the second one is. YAY, CONFLICT. We also went ahead and re-released chapters 11 and 12 to get you started. (That brings ch.12 up to a whopping v3, lawl. OH BOY, DOES THAT EVER LOOK GOOD.)

Download Barajou no Kiss chapter 13:
Attack! ☆ My Neighbor’s Body Measurements; and
Barajou no Kiss chapter 14: Beware of Idols?!

Anyway, not to be a fear-mongerer or anything, but if we don’t get any new editors in the near future, like, REALLY near future, we’re probably going to have to shut down for a while. Both Melly and I go to work AND school full time, and neither of us really has the extra time to do too much more of this on our own, so unless we get some more hands on staff, our release rate’s gonna go down even more than it already has… and that’s saying a lot. Again, visit the forums and take the EDITOR tests if you have the time! (We’re set with typesetters for the time being. All we need right now are IMAGE EDITORS.)

I LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING!

Last month I got it into my head that deadlines were for losers and caused far more stress to both myself and my comrades than I’d like to inflict on them for a thankless job with no compensation. No sooner had the thought occurred to me than I had woken up three weeks later, head fuzzy with no recollection of how I had spent my time previous and sleeping next to a mountain of veritable treasure, my apparent loot from a uninhibited buying frenzy at a convention no less than a four hour drive away. The first thought that came into my mind was, “Gee whiz, look at all this neat stuff!” followed by the sinking realization that I had sorely, sorely neglected my group in the meantime.

With that said, I apologize and offer you some brainless fluff as compensation for my woeful incompetence. Enjoy?

Download Omamori no Kamisama ch.2 – Hinako’s Omamori

And after you’re done reading that, try dropping by the forum and, I don’t know, APPLY FOR STAFF! (Editors and typesetters needed!)

If you’ve got the motivation and most importantly the time to spare, all you have to do is register for an account at the forums, make five posts, and then you’ll have access to the tests. The difficulty level is pretty high, but you don’t necessarily have to pass or even fully complete a test to be considered for a staff position. Just try, and we’ll work with you from there.

On that note, we’re going to start shifting our focus to appeal to a wider range of people – and that includes a heaping pile of SEINEN. So if you like the gritty stuff, we’ve got what you’re lookin’ for. Hopefully. What I’m trying to say is you probably shouldn’t apply if you’re all about butterflies and rainbows, because, uh, that makes us all die inside.

In the meantime, we DO have quite a few different titles almost ready for release, so… look forward to that, I guess?

It’s a well known fact that most of TP’s staff is around college age, and with that comes (drumroll, please) excessive schoolwork, which is what we’re all dealing with right now, and it seems that Barajou has become collateral damage in our ongoing war against atrophy. Woops.

Long story short, the next chapter of Barajou is going to be delayed a bit, but we’ll get it out when we can. In the mean time we might have some other releases, but that’s because we’ve got multiple staff working on their own projects, and Barajou just happens to be more time consuming than most.

Thanks for your understanding!

PS: By popular demand, we have a twitter now. I’m still trying to figure out how this works, so… follow us? =D

Panty shot cropped for your convenience… or displeasure, take your pick.

So after a million-year-long-wait (or more like, what, 4 months? Good god, I feel like a jerk now!), here, have a new chapter of Falces. I just want to point out here and now that this chapter is, eh, kind of NSFW, but then again, you shouldn’t be reading manga at work ANYWAY, much less Falces. This is where the real meat of the story comes into play (and my god, does the solid wall of text ever show that), so here’s hoping everyone enjoys the read. =3

Download Slayers: Hourglass of Falces ch. 3 – Requiem, Assembled Serenade

And again, we’re still on the lookout for new staff (especially editors!) and donations! Anything you can spare is A-OK with us, just look to the upper left corner of the menu bar for the donation button. To apply for a staff position, just drop by the forums, register for an account, and make five posts, then the application boards will show up for you. Thanks again, guys!

And I hope YOU’RE all happy.

A few kind viewers pointed out with the last chapter that we made a couple of hiccups with the final release (as usual), which I… promptly forgot to do anything about. Oops. The errors were pretty minor in scope, ranging from double commas (GO ME), to omitting words. The biggest mistake I can think of is on page 80 where the various stages of the contracts were described (I accidentally listed them all as “Stage I”), and the stupidest… Well, I misspelled some stuff on the credits page, but really, who cares about that? (We do, dammit! That’s why we’re releasing a v2!)

If you’re perfectly content with keeping the version you have, by all means, go for it. But if you download this version, you’ll get a sneak peak at some new art by Shouoto which came with this month’s Asuka magazine. >=D (INCENTIVE!)

Download Barajou no Kiss vol.3 ch.12 (v2)

And, um, please donate if you have any spare change lying around? =’D We’d love you forever.

This hug is from all of us at TP. Oh man, don’t make me say that twice.

A day late for our own anniversary, but that’s totally our style, isn’t it? Anyway, thanks for sticking with us for two years, guys. HERE’S TO AT LEAST A COUPLE MORE, EH?

To celebrate our second year in operation, have a new chapter of The Sleepy Residents of Birdcage Manor! Hands down the best shoujo title we’ve got going for us, (not saying much given the selection), though admittedly a strange move for an anniversary project, given our Slayers flagship status. Unfortunately there was a slight scheduling hiccup with our first choice, Falces, which we know you’re all dying to catch up with, that set us a little behind, but meh, it’ll be up in fairly short order. (I tentatively want to say next week.)

But enough of that, go download the newest chapter of Birdcage manor!

The Sleepy Residents of Birdcage Manor chapter 3: Street Brave Girl (III)

I’m starting to feel like a broken record, but we really are in need of donations, so anything you can spare, be it as little as a dollar, would be of tremendous assistance to us. Unfortunately, my financial standing has dropped somewhat as of late, and I’m finding it difficult to pay my own bills every month, let alone put enough money aside to purchase the manga volumes we scan in for our projects, which makes me feel terrible, but them’s the breaks. As it stands, unless we raise around $60, we simply will not be able to purchase any more books, including volume four of Datenroku or the next volume of Birdcage Manor.

Again, anything you can spare would greatly help us out, though all we can offer in return is the promise of more scanlations.

Kousetsu’s up to no good! But… When is he ever?

Let’s see if I can get this up before midnight, huh? ANYWAY.

Like the title suggests (but really, who reads the title? I’ll bet half of you looked straight down here to the contents of the post before you even went up there.), we’re starting off the new year right with some SLH. While not appropriately themed (May? Huhwhat?), SLH has at least one thing going for it, and that’s PLOT. Hell yeah. Also, Cain is a huge asshole and I think I might be starting to love him.

…But not as much as Ren. >=D

Download SLH chapter 3

And it’s been a while since we last pimped it out, but do you see that “donate” button up at the top of the menu? If you enjoy reading what we have to offer, then please, feel free to drop a token of your appreciation in our coffers. <3 Our funds have run pretty dry as of late, and we could really use the help! Remember, all money donated goes to fund current or future projects.

The face Natsu made after reading the end of this post.

Firstly, apologies for the wait, guys ‘n gals (lol, there are guys reading this?), HAVE SOME NEW SENMONO from us and our pals at CoyoMoose.

Download Sensei wa Ore no Mono chapter 2

And you know how sometimes you meet a guy (or gal, hey, I DON’T JUDGE) and they just seem to be the most awesome person in the world, and they even promise you FREE BEER on top of it? Well… Senmono is kind of like that, only the FREE BEER was a big fat lie, meant to suck you into a long-term relationship.

In short, we’re dropping the project, because Senmono stood us up on the b00ze. At least Natsu was cute, if not completely and utterly retarded. Worry not, for all you fans, CM will still be handling the project solo.